Wordless Wednesday: Siblings Meet

This is the best video of a set of three (you can view the others here) from this morning when Bo woke up and met his sisters. You can also see two cute little girls and a mom who hasn't slept much in the last 36 hours and pushed out twins approximately that long before this was recorded (yes, I look like hell... it's okay, I am aware...). :)

Bo is so cute and so far has really been taken with his sisters. I am still not really sure how we're going to pull this off -- but at least many of my concerns with Bo aren't immediately evident.

The birth story and updates on everything as soon as I can. It's been a bit... uh... crazy... around here.

For more Wordless Wednesday visit 5 Minutes for Mom and Momdot.com.

The Girls Have Arrived!

We are pleased to announce that our family is complete!

Announcing the birth of our twin girls

Clara Jane Weitl

September 28, 2009

5:32 pm

6 lbs. 11 oz.

18 inches long

Carle Foundation Hospital

Urbana, Illinois

and

Anna James Weitl

September 28, 2009

5:37 pm

6 lbs. 14 oz.

18 inches long

Carle Foundation Hospital

Urbana, Illinois

Both Jamie and the girls are doing well. Birth story will appear tomorrow.

The Last Hurrah

I've spent the last week "living it up" and making the most of my last few days before the girls arrival. My mom and I went shopping and out for lunch twice. Mike and I had both a lunch and a dinner date out all alone. Mom and I made cupcakes with Bo. We took Bo to an apple orchard/pumpkin patch on Saturday. I soaked in the bathtub. I've taken time to read a novel before bed. I actually watched the two hour season premiere of Grey's Anatomy (dvred version) all the way through with no interruptions. I've talked on the phone. I've read books, watched Cars, fed, bathed, and cuddled Bo. I cleaned the house and did laundry. I've tried to do many activities that I probably won't have the opportunity to do again for a long while, or at least not do nearly as easily...

Before Bo was born, I had no concept of how drastically having a child would change my life. This time around, I have some idea -- but still no real concept of what it will be like to parent newborn twins. Or what it will be like trying to combine toddler care, infant care, my relationships, my work, and my life. Or how I'll ever leave the house with all three of them... However, I do know, that life as we know it is about to end. And the fact is, a big part of me is sad about this period in our life ending. We've developed a routine that works for all of us. Mike and I are both able to work and have time to devote to other things while still keeping Bo as our number one priority. Everything is going to change. And even though I know it is a wonderful change - it's also a very scary change.

In reality, I know that truly this is only the beginning...

I am sure, that when I sit in my rocking chair at the old folks home, it will be this period of my life that I look back on the most. I'm proud of many of my accomplishments but I know that there will be no greater accomplishment than these children. Raising them. Nurturing them. Trying to be the best Mom I can be. Nothing else is more important or will have the same impact on my life.

Here we go... on to the next big stage of our lives.

Tomorrow, life as we know it changes.

Tomorrow, we complete our family.

Tomorrow, life begins.

******

I do plan to tweet and update the blog throughout the day tomorrow as long as I am able. If something happens where I can't update, I will have Mike update as he can and the official birth announcement will appear here as soon as possible.

P.S. A note to family and friends -- We will call my mom and Mike's mom before posting about the birth -- if you would prefer to receive the news via phone please email me so I can be sure that you are contacted before the information is posted.

The Plan

Some time ago, a blog reader requested a picture from the front. No, it isn't an optical illusion. The babies actually prefer my left side and seem to migrate that direction. You can really see my swelling and water retention in this picture. It had been a busy day and I had ingested a lot of sodium.

We'll here we are...

On the brink of induction...

After being in labor for 8 weeks...

After nearly a week of hospital bedrest and weeks of restrictions at home...

Dilated to more than a 4 for nearly 5 weeks...

Spurts of contractions 2 to 3 minutes apart...

We still have babies that are still firmly inside my uterus...

Tomorrow morning, I'll call labor and delivery around 5:30 am and hope that they have a bed available for me. If they do, we'll hop in the car, drive the 2 hours to Champaign and settle in to have some babies. (My mom will be at our house with Bo while I'm having babies. I know they'll be fine, but I'm not looking forward to being away from my little guy!) The plan is to try for a vaginal birth. Dr. F will be breaking my water first thing and starting pitocin to kick start the process soon after.

I do plan to have an epidural and I can have it at any point -- as I'm already dilated past a 4, which is the stage when epidurals are typically administered. I see no reason to be a martyr. No one is going to give me a medal if I have a drug-free delivery and I had an excellent epidural experience with Bo.

I know that labor provides no guarantees. I could end up with a c-section. I could end up with one vaginal birth and one c-section. I could end up with no epidural or my epidural may not work. Truly, I have no real expectations. I do not have an elaborate birth plan. For me, this is the best way to enter this situation - which probably seems odd given my Type A personality. I just know that I'll endure whatever it takes as long as I end up with two healthy girls in the end. I think that's been my philosophy all along...

37 weeks 4 days pregnant with twin girls. A part of me is embarrassed to post this photo here -- let's face it, I look awful. But another part of me is ridiculously proud of my huge body, swollen ankles, and puffy eyes. I've beat the odds! I made it FULL TERM with twins!!! Besides, we need a baseline picture to monitor my weight loss journey. :)

*****

I've published some "never before seen here" posts from before Bo's birth. They are from the original Sticky Feet blog and as I went back to read about my birth experience with Bo I thought they might make for some entertaining reading while everyone waits for me to have these girls. :) You can find all of the new posts here. The picture of my feet shows that my swelling at the end of this pregnancy is NOTHING compared to my pregnancy with Bo. I also found the post that talked about my mint cravings amusing. Apparently my babies like peppermint. Bo crunches on Breath Savers right along with me now. :)

Tantrums

Bo cuddles his special bear "Cinnamon" while fussing about something that I can't even remember.

There is no doubt about it - my little guy is on the cusp of being two and has developed his own demanding personality. Luckily, I love him so much that even when he is trying my patience completely I still find him completely adorable. However, I refuse to be the parent with "that child".

You've met "that child". He never listens. Doesn't pay attention. Isn't disciplined. And pretty much runs around like a chicken with his head cut off most of the time. Yep, that totally isn't going to fly when Mommy is around.

Bo reacts differently to different people. He knows what I will allow and rarely tests my limits. Same with my mom. However, people that he doesn't see as often seem to bring out the worst in him. He'll throw a fit and absolutely refuse to do whatever it is we expect of him -- be that sit in his chair or have his diaper changed. If he doesn't get his way, he'll scream and throw a tantrum like a banshee. It is not pretty.

Needless to say, I know that with the girls pending arrival there is going to be a lot more reason for tantrums, so I've been trying to prepare myself. I'm re-reading Toddlerwise (and Babywise for the girls). I've emailed several of my close blog friends to ask them how they are dealing with discipline with their children who are close in age to Bo. I'm trying my best to stay firm, consistent, and yet make sure he knows that he is unconditionally loved.

It's a lot more difficult than it sounds.

Tell me about your discipline philosophy. How do you deal with tantrums? What advice do you have for me as my little guy approaches his second birthday? Are there any books about this stage of parenting that you would recommend?

Ask Jamie: Hodge Podge

Recently, I've had several questions that don't warrant their own post, but that I still want to take the time to answer.

*****

Kathy H asks:

Because they are twins, will you be allowing them to sleep together (in the same bed) for at least a few months? I have heard this is good for twins.

At this point, we are not planning to have the girls sleep in the same crib. I have researched this a bit and while I do plan to try to keep the girls on the same schedule (waking one baby during the night if the other wakes to eat) I just feel strange about the idea of them sharing a crib -- however, I reserve the right to change my mind. I've never parented twins and maybe they will sleep better together. However, my initial reaction is not to have them share.

We do plan to put them in their own room, in their own cribs, from the first night (we did the same with Bo). I am slightly worried about having them share a room but we do have an extra crib in the basement guest room that can be used if sharing a room does not work out.

I would be very interested to hear from other twin moms on how they have dealt with sleeping arrangements. Did your twins share a crib? Did they sleep in a room together or have their own rooms? What do you recommend sleep-wise for twins?

*****

Sarah asks:

I LOVE the wall paint color... do you mind sharing the brand/color? (From this post about the girls' nursery).

Benjamin Moore - Eggshell Finish - Wildflowers (Thanks to my FIL for painting the girls' room!)

*****

Meghan asks:

Did you get a sling yet?

I had a Hotsling with Bo and I never really figured out how to use it. I ended up selling it on eBay. I did use the Baby Bjorn and a Mei Tai with Bo with some success. However, with twins, I'm unsure of how useful these will be. If one baby is fussy it would help with one -- or if there are two adults here then we could both carry a baby.... I'm just unsure of how helpful this will be with two infants and a toddler.

A friend did find this twin carrier and sent me the link -- but I've been unable to justify the purchase as I am unsure of how much I would use it since I didn't use a carrier much with Bo and I'm not sure how my back would hold up to using it either. Especially if I start out with fairly large babies.

Opinions on slings/carriers? Are there any special carriers that would be particularly helpful as I try to balance three children under the age of two?

*****

Kristi asks:

Where did you get those plates? I'm looking for ones just like them and can't seem to find them anywhere. (From the pictures this week of Bo's breakfast)

The plate in that picture was from Wal-Mart. It has three dividers - a large one at the bottom and two at the top. We have three of them and they were $1 each - however, I can't find them on their website. I also have several versions of this plate from Target that I've been happy with and they hold up well.

Friday's Feature at Sticky Feet Part Deux is Ask Jamie. Feel free to email me or leave a comment with any question you would like for me to answer. Anything is fair game!

Recovering Infertile

I recently read this post over at How Do You Do It? about one woman's thoughts on being a "recovering" infertile. And while I do agree -- infertility isn't something I want to submerse myself in daily and I'm not really sure how bloggers like Mel continually stay submerged in the ALI (Adoption, Loss, Infertility) world day after day (but I am very grateful that she does!), at the same time I feel like I will always be infertile.

I know that many of you that read here did not experience infertility. Some of you have endured infertility and have followed my journey from the early days when the blog was totally infertility centered. Many of you that have are in the same stage I am -- "parenting after infertility" (and yes, I think being a parent after infertility does change your perspective). However, I know just as many people that stop by who have no connection to infertility what-so-ever. It isn't a topic I write about every day any more. But it is still a big part of who I am.

Children don't change infertility. Maybe that seems backwards, but in my mind, it is true. I'm still infertile. I'm not going to wake up tomorrow and magically be able to become pregnant with no assistance. Yes, I will soon have three children. No, I will not have any more. No, I don't ever plan to undergo another IVF cycle. But I'm still infertile.

There is no doubt that infertility changed my life. Without experiencing infertility I would not be this person. I would not have these children. I would not have this blog. I would not have the same relationships. I would not be me.

From where I am now, it's easy to say that I wouldn't change a thing. I'm no longer bitter about my infertility -- I embrace it. I can look at other pregnant women, at other children, and not feel that twinge. It's how I know I'm finished with treatments. It's how I know that my family will soon be complete.

Infertility is and always will be part of who I am. Was it difficult to go through? Yes. Did I screw up some friendships along the way? Yep. In the end, did I come out on the other side a stronger and better person? Absolutely.

I've already touched on this idea this week -- I'm a big believer in the philosophy that "everything happens for a reason." And I'll be the first to admit that in the ALI community there are many moments when I ponder what could possibly be the reason behind the sorrow that is occurring. Why did a fellow IVFer lose her child in-utero at 36 weeks gestation? Why did someone who would be a great mom lose her only child to stillbirth? Why did a 10-month-old die? How is the adoptive mother going to move forward when her infant is returned to the birth mother at three days old? Why didn't this cycle work? Why did she have to experience a miscarriage? Why does her son have this disease? In our blogging community we see these experiences every day and it's hard to say what the reason behind this type of pain could be... but in the end, it's both the joys and the sorrows that bring our community together. And both the joys and the sorrows that define each person and make us who we are today.

While I wouldn't wish infertility on my worst enemy -- and while I will always define myself as an infertile -- I know that infertility is the path I was meant to walk and the journey I was destined to experience. The pain is much less when you have children in your arms, but looking back, I wouldn't trade the days my arms were empty either. Infertility has blessed me just as much as it damaged me.

Many of you who are still in the trenches will probably read this post and say that it's easy to feel this way from where I am now. And I'll readily agree with you. But at the same time, I feel like I made it this far because I wasn't willing to take "no" for an answer. I knew I would be a mom - whether that took 5 IVF cycles, taking out loans, changing jobs for insurance reasons, or heading down the path of adoption. I knew I would get there. If being a mom is something you truly want, you'll get there too. Will it be easy?? Absolutely not. Will it be worth it? Every second.

Wordless Wednesday: Breakfast

On Sunday morning, Bo was eating breakfast and Mike randomly grabbed the camera. The first three pictures he took and I just love the first one where Bo is laughing. If there is one thing you can definitely say about my little guy, it's that he has quite the appetite. For breakfast on Sunday he ate 6 silver dollar pancakes, an entire banana, and a cup of milk. The grocery bill for three children is probably going to bankrupt us!

For more Wordless Wednesday visit 5 Minutes for Mom and Momdot.com.

Our Own Little Zoo

The girls' room is finally finished! Currently, it's the only room in the house that I can say that about and it probably will be for a long time. On Sunday, we finally managed to finish putting everything on the walls. It is now totally ready for babies and the only room in my house ready for photographs!

We picked the theme before we knew we were having two girls and I am glad that we didn't decide to do a girly, pink theme. That just isn't my style. We actually had a lot of the room completed at the old house -- walls painted, pictures hung, etc. but it's taken us until now to totally finish the nursery here - maybe that's why the babies haven't arrived yet! The room is a zoo animal theme and the main colors are yellow, orange, and green. The walls are yellow and I tried to use orange and green accents wherever possible.

For me, a room isn't finished until the details are complete.

The glider is the same one we used with Bo. It's just been in the girls' room instead of his room since the move. In this picture you can see the cute giraffe lamp, giraffe hamper, and monkey ZooWallogy wall pop.
All of the girls' furniture is from Rooms 4 Kids in Arlington Heights. The beds convert to toddler beds and full size beds, so this furniture should last them until college. (Fingers crossed!) This picture is of the hutch/changing station. We'll easily be able to remove the changing pad and this will be one of the girl's dressers when they move to their own rooms. There is also an upright chest that matches their furniture sets that will go in the other girl's room when they are older. It's currently being used by my mom in her "guest room."

Details from the hutch picture -- the framed pictures on the left side are cross-stitch animals that Mike's mom originally made for his nursery. We had them cleaned and re-framed for the girls. You'll also notice the diaper champ, the animals in the top of the lighted hutch from Chasing Fireflies, the twin themed picture frame (that will eventually hold a picture of the girls), and the beautiful keepsake boxes. Both the boxes and the frame are from Aunt Manny.

Anna's crib is between the door and the closet. The rooms in our new house aren't as big as I would like and trying to fit two cribs in one room was quite the challenge. However, it works. The bumpers are these animal themed ones from Land of Nod (I just love everything from Land of Nod. I really want these rugs in orange and green and the multicolored polka changing pad cover -- but I haven't been able to convince myself they are worth the cost). Each girl has two sets of sheets -- one with zoo animals and another with multicolored polka dots. The name decals are rub-ons from Uppercase Living that can be removed when the girls are older.
Here is the girls' closet. We originally had their large dresser in the closet, but it was just too big. The small chest that is in the closet matches Bo's nursery furniture but isn't something he currently uses. As you can tell, we have been collecting clothing and we have plenty of newborn sleepers but I will be needing more sleepers in sizes 3-6 month, 6-9 month, and 9-12 month. At this point I've purchased very few "real" clothes for them. I figure they'll be in sleepers for awhile!
This is just the corner where the closet is located. Many of my frog stuffed animals are in the basket and the stuffed turtle pillow and a few little toys are on the floor. Bo loves to throw all of the animals out of the basket. Hopefully the animals and toys will keep him entertained during a few nursing sessions.
This is the view from the doorway of the room and you can see Clara's crib. Both girl's have mobiles in a zoo animal themebut they are slightly different. You can also see the giraffe Zoowallogy wall pop.

Overall, I'm really pleased with how the room turned out and I don't feel like my pictures (taken at night) even begin to do it justice. I love all of the little details and I'm excited to bring the girl's home to their new room. Now, if I could just get on the ball and finish the rest of the house... ;)

Interested in pictures of Bo's nursery? Click here. Bo's new room is almost set -- with a cars theme. Pictures coming soon.

Do you like the ZooWallogy wall pops?? If so, click over to my review blog for a chance to win your own!!

Grateful

Yes, I will be the first to admit it. I'm uncomfortable. I'm huge. Doing anything is a workout. I am so sick of taking shots and checking my blood sugar. There are moments when I want nothing more than to go into labor and eject these girls from my body. I am tired of being pregnant. I hate what pregnancy has done to my body. I want to be able to walk normally again. I want to be able to move. I want to be able to sleep for more than an hour without having to go to the bathroom.

Yet, despite how uncomfortable as I am right now... and as much as simple tasks totally take their toll on my body... I am very grateful that the girls decided to take up residence in my uterus for nearly 37 weeks.

Obviously, I am very grateful that the girls will be much healthier since they did not debut at 30 weeks. We will most likely not be facing any NICU time and will bring home two healthy little girls within days of birth. No one, including my doctor, can believe that we've made it this far or that I've been in labor for this long. The girls have already shown that they are determined and stubborn (I think they come by both of those traits fairly naturally...). There is nothing I could be more grateful for than the chance to bring home healthy twins after infertility and a less than ideal pregnancy.

And as any one who has read here for awhile knows, I truly do believe that everything happens for a reason...

My pre-term labor, early dilation, and months of (pain-free) contractions, have all served numerous purposes during this time in my life. I truly believe that I had to be hospitalized for the light bulb to flash for my mom regarding our move -- not exactly the way I would have orchestrated the situation -- but it worked, and our relationship is better because of the twins, because of the hospitalization, because she decided to come stay with us and help during this time, and because of the realizations that must have occurred. And I am grateful.

I also believe that I had to experience all of this to make me not kill myself during the move and during these first few months in the house. If I hadn't been pregnant, I would have pushed myself much harder. Would the house look better than it does? Of course. But would it really be worth the strain and stress I would have endured? Probably not. I'm grateful that this pregnancy and various other factors have forced me to slow down a bit more than I otherwise would have.

I am grateful for the opportunity for a few more months with only one child. To have these last two months to dote on Bo, truly admire his cuteness, and focus entirely on his development as he blossoms before my eyes each day has been a blessing. I worry about what I might miss or overlook as my mindset shifts from totally Bo-centered to focusing on three children. I feel blessed and grateful to be able to witness this stage in Bo's life so completely and yet grateful that he will soon be a big brother. In many ways, I feel like these girls are a gift to him and a chance to have a type of relationship that I will never experience. I am grateful for the nearly two years I've had with Bo as my only child and for the opportunity to give him siblings.

Being able to have a few months in the house before the girls' arrival has also been a blessing. This house, this area, still doesn't feel like "home" and I know that it will be many months before I feel that "home" feeling -- however, I feel like I have a fighting chance of achieving "home" much sooner since I've had a few months to adjust before adding another huge life change to my plate. We were in our previous house for over a year before I finally felt settled and I have no doubt that it may take longer for me to settle in here as the transition is much greater than living in my hometown. However, I am still grateful that I didn't spend the first weeks of our time in this area in the NICU with the girls and did not have to bring them home to the shambles that was our house at that point.

This pregnancy and everything that has happened over the last several months has not been ideal. It isn't the way I would have planned and it hasn't been easy. But I do believe that it has all happened for a reason and I am grateful for the opportunity to experience and live through everything that life has thrown at me. One week from today, I'll be induced, and life will throw more challenges my way.

I'm ready.

Newborns

Tertia had an interesting post on her site recently asking the question "Are you a newborn person?"

I didn't have to blink before thinking to myself, "absolutely not." I am not a newborn person. I don't swoon over little babies and think they are just so cute and adorable and what not. Not even my own newborn. Sure, I loved Bo unconditionally from the very start -- but I will readily admit to counting the months of his first year and praising the lord for each month that passed. At three months it was better. At six months even better, and so forth.

I'm just not a newborn person. As Bo began to interact more and develop a personality, I found myself loving him more and more. Newborns don't really interact and it's difficult to know what they need or want. And while I'll admit to being highly frustrated by Bo's "no-no-no" fits I much prefer the fits and communication to those newborn days.

Tertia links to this article about a woman who just loved having a newborn. Is it sad that my immediate reaction is that she must have blocked some of it?? :)

I guess this is another reason why I'm worried about bringing the girls home. Now, I'll have two little babies that I'll have to try to figure out/guess what they want on a round-the-clock basis. It was difficult with one and those newborn days are still fresh in my mind... I can't imagine how I'll deal with two crying babies and probably a crying toddler on top of it. At least with Bo, I'll be able to talk to him but with the girls I'll be running through a never ending list of reasonable reasons for their discontent while trying to learn and figure out the sound of their cries.

I'm not really relishing the idea of living through the newborn months again... with two...

My motto is, "If we can just make it through the first year."

Ask Jamie: Gestational Diabetes

Jill asks:

I am currently 28 weeks pregnant with a singleton and just found out I have gestational diabetes. Can you tell me more about your experience? What are some good foods and snacks for keeping my sugar level in check?

Gestational Diabetes can be pretty scary and it is definitely an issue that will require more doctor's appointments and monitoring. I am currently going to the doctor two times per week for non-stress tests and weekly ultrasounds to make sure that the babies are doing okay despite my high blood sugar levels. I test my blood sugar four times per day and I am on two shots of long acting and three shots of fast acting insulin per day. My insulin is increased at nearly every appointment as the placentas grow larger and make it more and more difficult for my body to process glucose.

In some ways, I feel lucky that I experienced infertility as it has put everything else about pregnancy in a different perspective for me. I am more than willing to do whatever I have to do -- be it drive two hours to appointments, stick myself with multiple needles and lancets, etc. if it means ending up with healthy babies.

I only failed the original glucose test by 1 point so I was very hopeful that I would be able to control my glucose levels by diet alone, but that has not been the case at all. Many times I feel sick after I eat and so that has made it more difficult for me to gain weight. I thought pregnancy was suppose to be a free for all buffet but that definitely has not been the case.

As far as eating, it quickly became obvious that I am a total carb addict. I've really struggled to find good sources of protein and fat to add to my diet. Some foods that I've found keep my glucose levels in check include all meats and cheeses, hard boiled eggs and colby jack cheese, a small apple with peanut butter or cheese, celery with peanut butter, mixed nuts, etc. I've also been drinking a lot of smoothies. I've been making the smoothies with sugar free Carnation instant breakfast. (Example: 1 cup crushed ice, 1 cup milk, a whole banana, and 5-6 Tablespoons of the chocolate powder and blend. I also do the same thing with vanilla and strawberries). The smoothies taste sweet and gives me quite a few calories, vitamins, and protein. The instant breakfast has a lot of protein and vitamins which seems to balance the sugar from the milk and banana while keeping my numbers in range. Fruit without some type of protein source really makes my numbers spike.

I love sweets and desserts so limiting them and my beloved peppermint patties has been very difficult. I eat a ton of sugar free breath savers to work on that craving... Mike and I recently discussed the number of mints I've eaten this pregnancy and it is outrageous. I've literally eaten hundreds of them.

Have you experienced gestational diabetes? What was your experience like? What were some good foods/snacks that you ate during that time period to help regulate your blood sugar? What advice do you have for others dealing with gestational diabetes?

Friday's Feature at Sticky Feet Part Deux is Ask Jamie. Feel free to email me or leave a comment with any question you would like for me to answer. Anything is fair game!

Type A Personalities, Multiples, and Cleaning

I ended up having this conversation on Facebook yesterday (names have been altered to protect the innocent). :)

Jamie Bolander Weitl is pondering why it seems like this house becomes dirty much more quickly than my old house. Didn't I just finish cleaning???

Yesterday at 9:02am via Twitter · Comment · Like

Jamie's Mom

House really isn't dirty. A little cluttered with Bo's toys but that is to be expected...Hardwood floors in the kitchen and Bo don't exactly match.. He is a little messy with his eating habits but getting better. And 5 cats, right now, what do you expect? A few fur balls, right!!

Yesterday at 9:35am · Delete

Jamie's Mom We do go through a lot of dishes in a day, I must say!!! Laundry, every couple of days...

Yesterday at 9:38am · Delete

Jamie Bolander Weitl

More laundry once the girls arrive too, I'm sure....

Yesterday at 9:40am · Delete

Jamie Bolander Weitl

And Mom, I love you -- but I think we have different definitions of clean and clutter. ;)

Yesterday at 9:42am · Delete

Jamie's Mom Retirement--has turned me from a perfectionist into a" oh well maybe later" type person. Don't sweat the small stuff---it will still be there tomorrow or the next day.. actually who cares! It is not like we have a house full of company every day... a little clutter and cat fur never hurt anybody...

Yesterday at 9:52am · Delete

Jamie Bolander Weitl

If I could make it not drive me crazy, I would. But it does. And it isn't about other people seeing it -- it's about ME seeing it!! :) I just feel more peaceful when things are clean and in their proper place. ;)

Yesterday at 10:01am · Delete

High School Colleague/Fellow Blogger Me too, no one else seems to get that!

Yesterday at 10:12am · Delete

Jamie Bolander Weitl I

t's a bad complex. You're a Type A, like me, aren't you? :)

Yesterday at 10:25am · Delete

Jamie's Mom Let me ask you this. is anybody going to give a rip or remember in 6 months whether or not your house is spotless?With babies things are not always perfect and will never be.... Driivng yourself nuts over little things is foolish.. Making memories is more fun and beneficial to all..

Yesterday at 11:53am · Delete

Jamie Bolander Weitl

It isn't about "anybody" and I am all about making memories. I just like for things to be clean and clutter free. It makes me happier. It isn't about anyone else.

Yesterday at 11:56am · Delete

Jamie Bolander Weitl

That said, I'm going to clean my bathroom. And no, no one is going to see it. That clean toilet is just for me. ;)

Yesterday at 12:07pm · Delete

Same High School Alum/Blog Reader

I'm with you on this! I feel like all I do is clean. No one comes over and I'm gone a lot with work, but it still makes me crazy if it's not perfectly clean. The Terminix guy said the other week, "Gosh, the poor bugs would starve in here, you keep it so damn clean." It made me smile. :)

Yesterday at 1:07pm · Delete

Friend/Matron of Honor in Wedding I'm with Cindy. Three kids has definitely chilled me out...unless I'm having company. Then I get all paranoid about being judged for my mess, except for a select few buds who I know won't care (and I've seen their mess too, so we're even). :)

Yesterday at 2:21pm · Delete

Same High School Alum/Blog Reader

I don't have kids, so I can't really say much. I worry about the day that I do have them though. I'm sure I'll be in for a rude awakening as far as keeping everything in it's place and tidy. It'll be a major adjustment on several levels. ;)

Yesterday at 2:57pm · Delete

Same High School Alum/Fellow Infertile

I'm with **** on that one, even though I don't have any kids yet, it is bad enough right now without any. So, hopefully by the time I do have them, prob in the next year or two, we will have robots to help out with that! :) One could only hope!

Yesterday at 4:39pm · Delete

As many of you know, my mom has been staying with us since I was put on bedrest at a little over 30 weeks. It's been a good thing for all of us. That said, it's obvious that my mom lost sight of some of my anal retentiveness in the years that we haven't lived together and doesn't totally understand my obsession with having a house that is clean and clutter-free. (And let me just state -- for the record -- this house has not been completely clean or clutter-free since we moved in by my standards. However, one day, it will be!).

It isn't like this is a new quirk to my personality or I'm just nesting. I've ALWAYS been this way. I remember thoroughly cleaning my room on Friday nights during middle school and I always cleaned my dorm room on Mondays. If my room wasn't clean I knew there was no way that I was going to be able to focus on studying! Everyone said I wouldn't be able to keep a clean house after Bo was born -- but overall, I think I've managed pretty well and I hope it won't be too disasterous after the girls arrive as well.

It isn't that I'm necessarily domestic. Or that I truly care what others think -- as Mom states above, no one is here but us. It's just that I can't relax when things are dirty. When things are cluttered. And yes, I'm sure that is difficult on the people I live with. Luckily, Mike has many of the same hyper-anal quirks (thanks Jim and Sherri!) but there are still some things that he just doesn't seem to see that drive me up the wall!! And I know there are things I overlook that drive him crazy too... He worries more about the garage, the yard, etc. where I worry more about what is inside the house and the mirror that's been propped in our living room for the last two months.

Add together moving, bedrest, and a new house and you can see how I was mentally going crazy for weeks since I wasn't suppose to be doing anything around the house. And I will definitely say that I wish I could be doing more now -- at 36 weeks pregnant with twins my cleaning frenzy goes a lot slower and definitely isn't to the level that I would prefer. Have you tried to do dishes (or even brush your teeth) with an extra two feet in front of your body?? Not fun - or comfortable! But I still try to do as much as I can without totally killing myself.

And it also isn't that I'm not willing to pay someone else to clean - I realize that my time is valuable and that cleaning isn't always the best use of my time for financial reasons or for all of those "memory making" reasons that Mom mentions above. I'm totally not opposed to a housekeeper and realize the value if it means I have more time to spend with my children -- but right now -- with two mortgages and a nanny, it seems like just another added expense - so I clean when Bo sleeps or when Katie is here. I've debated trading the nanny for a housekeeper numerous times over the last few weeks but everyone keeps telling me to wait it out and see what I really need after the girls arrive.

I guess the point of this post is that my cleaning issues aren't about anyone else. It's about me. It's about what I need to feel comfortable. It's my own issue. And honestly, I kinda like it. Sure, it is annoying sometimes -- but in numerous ways my perfectionism has paid off throughout my life. A friend I've made through blogging (hi Merri Ann!) wrote this in an email to me about a week ago: "As far as the worrying ... I had a mother of triplets tell me once that she is convinced that only type A personalities have multiples ... she said it was God's way of showing us how to slow down and learn that not everything can be perfect ... it still makes me laugh when I think about how acurate that statement was for me."

I will say that having Bo has calmed me down a bit in my perfectionism. I much prefer playing cars or reading him a book over mopping the floor and that is why I clean when he sleeps or is otherwise occupied. But I'm sure the girls will do even more to make me realize that it can't all be perfect all the time. I never thought I'd be able to leave toys on the living room floor, but now I don't even see them.

That said, I also think that probably only Type A people have multiples because they are truly the only ones that can handle it! Type A's just deal with life differently than others and in some ways I think some of these traits are needed to deal with the extreme stress and the work that comes from mothering multiples (obviously I don't know this firsthand yet -- just a theory!). Most people hate Kate Gosselin, but can you really imagine trying to take care of eight kids (six of whom are the same age) and a house without having at least some anal retentive traits??

I've also noticed that many infertiles are definitely Type A...

Thoughts?